my story

I am not an expert on grief or the healing. It has taken me five years and five months tomorrow Dec. 23 2025.

What I have learned is that every journey of Grief is uniquely our own, my family have a great number of looses since May of 2020. The one that hits us the most is the lose of our son. To the act of suicide Royce Austin Sam Aug. 27 1996 – July 23 2020.

Although my husband and I live in the same house we go through the different stages at different times. At times it feels like the world is going to end with the next breath.

I have turned to the bible and with the help of some very kind people, found verses that helped me get on the path of healing. In no way will I ever be fully healed, but at least now I don’t feel like i’m broken into a zillion pieces. I can laugh, without feeling guilty, for been a live when our son couldn’t be.

I wanted to blame someone for the lose. Only to realize that I was looking for a place to put my misery. To blame someone else, was me put my misery on them, and I couldn’t do that. I felt they had their own pain from his lose and didn’t, and wouldn’t put my pain on them. So I worked had at finding what I could do to possibly help others as I also dealt with my pain. I had been writing on a Facebook page, that slowed down, and I have so many ideas on things I could do. There are so many projects I have on the go. I am excited about this.

So before I start rambling I will call it a night. May God Bring you comfort, peace, and blessings.

Forever and always me.